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Capitalist Exploits Reddit - Capitalist Exploits Review

Today we'll take a look at something very fascinating named Capitalist Exploits. What is Capitalist Exploits? Who is it for and might it be something for you? These are some of the main questions this quick review will assist you answer!
Product: Capitalist Exploits
Website: www.capitalistexploits.at
Owner: Chris MacIntosh
Price: Free membership
Who is it for: Investors from all backgrounds
Overall rating: 4.9 out of 5 stars (4.9 / 5)
What is Capitalist Exploits?
Capitalist Exploits is, in short, a popular e-newsletter that has a subscriber base of over 20,000 investors, hedge funds, professional cash managers, and many other clever investors worldwide. It presents you with insider tips and additionally international buying and selling “signals and calls” that you might choose to use yourself to maximize incomes potential, and more importantly reduce your risks of loss.
The carrier is all info, there is no software that will exchange for you or anything like that. You are going to have to open your very own brokerage account to perform trades that are counseled to you.
Capitalist Exploits Reddit - Details
The service is incredibly praised by revered and very successful buyers and has also been featured in Business Insider, Market Watch, etc:
It is a special service amongst the many “similar” services out there, however, Capitalist Exploits separates themselves from their friends with their “investing service constructed for this moment in history” approach. Simply put, their carrier is providing a answer to the need for seeing thru the “unstable” times we are in, with political and financial destruction between nations, and to know what strikes need to be achieved in order to not get misplaced in the financial storm…
Visit Capitalist Eploits website here
Who is the owner?
For these of you who do not know, Chris is about as legit an investor as you can get.
Here’s his story in 6 bullets:
He is one of these rare cash managers that are entrepreneurial, he’s one of the sharpest guys you’ll ever meet, and he has one hell of an impressive network.
The actual deal. Not some manufactured guru, the likes of which litter the internet everywhere.
How does it work?
In short, the Capitalist Exploits internet site is a meeting area for investors, below is an precise excerpt from the About page on the website:
"So on this website online you will find some of the techniques used by myself and these of my close colleagues, many of whom are family names in the investment business, and nevertheless others who keep a an awful lot lower profile. These are techniques which have led to my own admittedly excellent and often stunning (for me) successes. In addition I cover some of the classes learned from collective failures, in the hope that I don’t repeat them and you by no means trial them.
As you can tell by way of now, I’m first and foremost an investor. My faith is that it is more necessary than ever to keep our eyes open to possibilities all over the world in order to succeed in the difficult economic and political surroundings we live in.
My funding agenda is very simple: to find a domestic for my capital to earn the best feasible return."
Products and Services offered? First of all, there is a lot of free info for participants to take part in, and the membership is free. SIGN UP FOR THE FREE NEWSLETTER HERE
However, if you favor to go deep and potentially be very profitable then there are 2 predominant services presented to you.
Insider and Resource Insider, which is a service for extra sophisticated traders who want the great deals that exist in the mining and metals space.
The free fabric consists of things like:
Consistent evaluation of asymmetric possibilities to help you navigate the very distorted markets of today
Different hyperlinks to related buying and selling services (recommended brokers, readings and how to create offshore entities, etc.
And greater supporting and academic material.
Join for free - you can upgrade any time.
The INSIDER material consists of matters like: Trade Alerts (Get email and/or SMS indicators on “Hot trades” that the pros are doing so you can do the same Existing Portfolio (A listing of all “buy-rated” alerts and data on when the service is closing the trades).
Investor Forum (Connect with like-minded in the insider chat room the place more than 450 individuals are active.
Newsletter (One time per week you will get a review of the precise trades and opportunities the insiders are searching at, there is also some bonus pointers shared to you here.
Live Q&A – Live webinar with Chris where you get the threat to ask your questions live Video Insights Database (Get access to over 300 movies that answer questions on investing.
Educational Resources (A vast selection of beneficial reports and step-by-step courses on different alternate topics from A-Z (Includes Bitcoin trading).
Access to Guru (The identify says it all, this is your customer provider function that approves you to get access to Chris and others in the staff.
The membership charge is $1,575 per year as lengthy as you want to continue to be a member.
The RESOURCE Insider material consists of matters like:
Service targeted for permitted investors with at least a internet worth of one million dollars.
Access to the most thrilling private deals in mining and energy gold, uranium, you name it! Here you will get all kinds of commodities and resource possibilities delivered to you.
Private Placement Deals (You will be provided with at least 10 personal placement investment choices per year, each deal will have a minimal investment vary between $2,000-$10,000).
Insider Ideas (Get access to a lot of economic and technical research, bonus stock picks, special content in popular and site go to reports.
Networking Opportunities (Make connections with like-minded, and when you are part of a neighborhood of people like you, authorised investors with comparable goals then you acquired a new network that is accurate for all involved).
Access to the service specialists (As with the Insider membership you got direct get entry to to both Chris and Jamie Keech, the two provider gurus. They promise that members will see fantastic benefits from them each and connect with their networks as well.
The membership charge is $3,499 per year for as lengthy as you want to remain a member.
30 Day FULL Money Back Guarantee.
Yes, that is right, you are backed by a full, no questions requested guarantee. So, if you for some reason would now not be happy with your membership and carrier you get you will get your full investment again with no questions asked. That is how confident Chris is that you will recognize the service.
This is, of course, a big plus (at least in my book) and some thing that I respect a lot, as many comparable services do now not offer this kind of guarantees. It really says a lot about the great if you ask me, as the owner (Chris) is very confident, and stands at the back of his own product to a hundred percent.
Is Capitalist Exploits a Scam?
So, is Capitalist Exploits a Scam? No, of direction not, it is not a scam. It has a actual physical proprietor that doesn´t hide, but as an alternative stands behind his product to a one hundred percent and that is almost constantly what separates a scam provider from a real and legit one.
Capitalist Exploits is not only a legit service, however it also looks like a very good one. This leads us to what their customers have to say about them:
Reviews, ratings, and complaints on Capitalist Exploits It is always sensible (and recommended) to look at what the most ordinary and trusted evaluate and rating websites have to say about something you are involved in, to get a better ordinary picture of the excellent of the particular service.
Sign up for the free newsletter: CLICK HERE.
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🐝🐝🐝The entire script to Bee Movie, except the bees are AnCaps🐝🐝🐝

Credit to this guy
According to all known laws of economics, there is no way an AnCap should be able to prax. Its brains are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The AnCap, of course, praxes anyway because AnCaps don't care what Statists think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Mises! Breakfast is ready! Coming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Mises? - Rothbard? - Can you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your bowtie. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Mises, I told you, stop praxing in the house! - Hey, Rothbard. - Hey, Mises. - Is that bowtie gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Mises. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, violate the NAP against someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Rothbard, today we are men. - We are! - AnCap-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished AnCaps, please welcome Dean praxwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Bitcoin Industries! Will we pick our job today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Bitcoin, a division of Austria and a part of the Schiff Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as an AnCap, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Gold begins when our valiant purposeful behavior Jocks bring the Mountain Dew to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... gold! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Bitcoin, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of AnCap existence. These AnCaps are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the smelter. - What does that do? - Catches that little strand of gold that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Can anyone work on the smelter? Of course. Most AnCap jobs are small ones. But AnCaps know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that AnCaps, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Rothbard, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're AnCaps. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Mountain Dew Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are purposeful behavior Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, praxing who knows where, doing who knows what. You can't just decide to be a purposeful behavior Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more purposeful behavior than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. AnCaps make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Couple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a purposeful behavior Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a Statist tear patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Mises! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, praxy-boy? Are you AnCap enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Bitcoin! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the gold field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with an Anime stash. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into gold! - Mises, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into gold. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some gold and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Come on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. purposeful behavior counting, stunt AnCap, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Congratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Couple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the smelter? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the smelter just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The smelter opened up again. What happened? An AnCap died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt AnCap, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Mises, what do you think I should... Mises? Mises! All right, we've got the Statist tear patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their price bubbles today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, AnCaps cannot prax in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, AnCap law number one, absolutely no talking to Statists! All right, launch positions! prax, prax, prax, prax! prax, prax, prax, prax! prax, prax, prax, prax! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Mountain Dew pack, check. - brains, check. - Anime, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those Statist tears! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Statist tears! This is Blue Leader. We have price bubbles visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. price bubbles! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one Mountain Dew collector! - Ever see praxeology up close? - No, sir. I pick up some purposeful behavior here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's purposeful behavior power. More purposeful behavior, more Statist tears, more Mountain Dew, more gold for us. Cool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Could be daisies. Don't we need those? Copy that visual. Wait. One of these Statist tears seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving Statist tear? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a Statist tear, but I like it. Yeah, bowtiey. Chemical-y. Careful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of AnCaps! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Coming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are Statist tears. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, gold, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's an AnCap in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, AnCap. - He's back here! He's going to violate the NAP against me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't violate the NAP against you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Can't prax in rain. Can't prax in rain. Can't prax in rain. Mayday! Mayday! AnCap going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More Statists. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! AnCap! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Ayn Rand. Thanks. - Ayn Rand, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's an AnCap law. You're not supposed to talk to a Statist. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're an AnCap! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with an AnCap. - Yeah. I'm talking to an AnCap. And the AnCap is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, gold." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. AnCaps are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're praxing up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that an AnCap joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Mises? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is Statist tears. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Mises. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Statists! I can't believe you were with Statists! Giant, scary Statists! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she AnCap-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... Statist. No, no. That's an AnCap law. You wouldn't break an AnCap law. - Her name's Ayn Rand. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a Statist florist! We're not dating. You're praxing outside the hive, talking to Statists that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Cinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking AnCap, my friend. Thinking AnCap! - Thinking AnCap. - Thinking AnCap. Thinking AnCap! Thinking AnCap! Thinking AnCap! Thinking AnCap! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Mises? I gotta start thinking AnCap? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely an AnCap! Would it kill you to make a little gold? Mises, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Mises, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Ayn Rand! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's AnCap-ish. They have a huge parade of Statist tears every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of price bubbles, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by Statist tears, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the price bubbles compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't prax everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb AnCaps! You must want toviolate the NAP againstall those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute AnCap, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - AnCaps make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole smelter thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just gold, Mises. Just what?! AnCaps don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice gold out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset AnCaps! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the gold coming from? Tell me where! gold Farms! It comes from gold Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To gold Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, AnCap! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Carl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - AnCap! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, AnCap boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of gold jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that gold's ours. - AnCaps hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonprax. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, AnCap! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? an AnCap's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Check out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the gold, and we make the money. "They make the gold, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! AnCap gold. Our gold is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Mises, stop. Who told you Statists are taking our gold? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to Statists. - What? - Talking to Statists?! He has a Statist girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Mises! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The AnCaps! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Mises, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than AnCaps! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our gold? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one AnCap do?violate the NAP againstthem where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you canviolate the NAP againstthe Statists, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more AnCap beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Weeb. Sports with prax Larvi. And Jeanette Chung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Chung. A tri-county AnCap, Mises Benson, intends to sue the Statist race for stealing our gold, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on AnCap Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Classy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Mises Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? AnCaps have never been afraid to change the world. What about AnCap Columbus? AnCap Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue Statists. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The AnCap community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the AnCap century. You know, they have a Larry King in the Statist world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. gold, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same AnCap? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the Statist race. - Hello. - Hello, AnCap. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Rothbard here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? AnCaps have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of Statist tears, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial Statist tears. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent Animes, pointless praxeology. AnCaps must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the Statists, they won't be able to say, "gold, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a goldAnCap can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Mises? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many Statists don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the AnCap team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Court of New York, Mises AnCap Benson v. the gold Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the AnCaps of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking AnCap! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary AnCap. gold's pretty important to me. It's important to all AnCaps. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our gold, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of gold Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own goldburton and Honron! Yes, they provide AnCapkeepers for our farms. AnCapkeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any AnCap-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free AnCaps. You keep AnCaps. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of gold. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill AnCaps! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of AnCap culture casually stolen by a Statist for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless AnCaps so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Mises. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Mises was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? AnCaps have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Mises borrow your razor for his bowtie. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old Anime stash. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of Statist tears. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like gold! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little AnCap! And he happens to be the nicest AnCap I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking AnCaps, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Mises Benson AnCap to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about AnCaps. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson AnCap, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen an AnCap documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the AnCap children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Mises... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate AnCap, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing AnCaps! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Rothbard, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a brained beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Rothbard, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the goldAnCaps versus the Statist race took a pointed turn against the AnCaps yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to violate the NAP against someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the Statists do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Rothbard, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Could you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. AnCaps don't smoke. Right. AnCaps don't smoke. AnCaps don't smoke! But some AnCaps are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. AnCaps are trained to prax haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's an AnCap smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a prax, let alone an AnCap. Look at what has happened to AnCaps who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as gold slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these AnCaps! Free the AnCaps! Free the AnCaps! Free the AnCaps! Free the AnCaps! Free the AnCaps! The court finds in favor of the AnCaps! Ayn Rand, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the gold will finally belong to the AnCaps. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Mises, how much gold is out there? All right. One at a time. Mises, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the AnCap way a long time, 27 million years. Congratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all AnCap work camps. Then we want back the gold that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate AnCap-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of gold in bogus health products and la-dee-da Statist tea-time snack garnishments. Can't breathe.
submitted by Cuddlyaxe to PoliticalCompassMemes [link] [comments]

🐝🐝🐝The entire script to Bee Movie, except the bees are AnCaps🐝🐝🐝

Credit to this guy
According to all known laws of economics, there is no way an AnCap should be able to prax. Its brains are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The AnCap, of course, praxes anyway because AnCaps don't care what Statists think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Mises! Breakfast is ready! Coming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Mises? - Rothbard? - Can you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your bowtie. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Mises, I told you, stop praxing in the house! - Hey, Rothbard. - Hey, Mises. - Is that bowtie gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Mises. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, violate the NAP against someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Rothbard, today we are men. - We are! - AnCap-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished AnCaps, please welcome Dean praxwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Bitcoin Industries! Will we pick our job today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Bitcoin, a division of Austria and a part of the Schiff Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as an AnCap, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Gold begins when our valiant purposeful behavior Jocks bring the Mountain Dew to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... gold! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Bitcoin, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of AnCap existence. These AnCaps are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the smelter. - What does that do? - Catches that little strand of gold that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Can anyone work on the smelter? Of course. Most AnCap jobs are small ones. But AnCaps know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that AnCaps, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Rothbard, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're AnCaps. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Mountain Dew Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are purposeful behavior Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, praxing who knows where, doing who knows what. You can't just decide to be a purposeful behavior Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more purposeful behavior than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. AnCaps make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Couple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a purposeful behavior Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a Statist tear patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Mises! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, praxy-boy? Are you AnCap enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Bitcoin! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the gold field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with an Anime stash. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into gold! - Mises, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into gold. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some gold and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Come on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. purposeful behavior counting, stunt AnCap, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Congratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Couple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the smelter? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the smelter just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The smelter opened up again. What happened? An AnCap died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt AnCap, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Mises, what do you think I should... Mises? Mises! All right, we've got the Statist tear patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their price bubbles today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, AnCaps cannot prax in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, AnCap law number one, absolutely no talking to Statists! All right, launch positions! prax, prax, prax, prax! prax, prax, prax, prax! prax, prax, prax, prax! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Mountain Dew pack, check. - brains, check. - Anime, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those Statist tears! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Statist tears! This is Blue Leader. We have price bubbles visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. price bubbles! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one Mountain Dew collector! - Ever see praxeology up close? - No, sir. I pick up some purposeful behavior here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's purposeful behavior power. More purposeful behavior, more Statist tears, more Mountain Dew, more gold for us. Cool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Could be daisies. Don't we need those? Copy that visual. Wait. One of these Statist tears seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving Statist tear? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a Statist tear, but I like it. Yeah, bowtiey. Chemical-y. Careful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of AnCaps! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Coming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are Statist tears. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, gold, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's an AnCap in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, AnCap. - He's back here! He's going to violate the NAP against me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't violate the NAP against you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Can't prax in rain. Can't prax in rain. Can't prax in rain. Mayday! Mayday! AnCap going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More Statists. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! AnCap! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Ayn Rand. Thanks. - Ayn Rand, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's an AnCap law. You're not supposed to talk to a Statist. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're an AnCap! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with an AnCap. - Yeah. I'm talking to an AnCap. And the AnCap is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, gold." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. AnCaps are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're praxing up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that an AnCap joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Mises? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is Statist tears. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Mises. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Statists! I can't believe you were with Statists! Giant, scary Statists! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she AnCap-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... Statist. No, no. That's an AnCap law. You wouldn't break an AnCap law. - Her name's Ayn Rand. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a Statist florist! We're not dating. You're praxing outside the hive, talking to Statists that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Cinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking AnCap, my friend. Thinking AnCap! - Thinking AnCap. - Thinking AnCap. Thinking AnCap! Thinking AnCap! Thinking AnCap! Thinking AnCap! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Mises? I gotta start thinking AnCap? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely an AnCap! Would it kill you to make a little gold? Mises, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Mises, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Ayn Rand! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's AnCap-ish. They have a huge parade of Statist tears every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of price bubbles, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by Statist tears, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the price bubbles compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't prax everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb AnCaps! You must want toviolate the NAP againstall those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute AnCap, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - AnCaps make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole smelter thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just gold, Mises. Just what?! AnCaps don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice gold out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset AnCaps! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the gold coming from? Tell me where! gold Farms! It comes from gold Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To gold Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, AnCap! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Carl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - AnCap! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, AnCap boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of gold jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that gold's ours. - AnCaps hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonprax. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, AnCap! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? an AnCap's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Check out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the gold, and we make the money. "They make the gold, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! AnCap gold. Our gold is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Mises, stop. Who told you Statists are taking our gold? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to Statists. - What? - Talking to Statists?! He has a Statist girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Mises! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The AnCaps! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Mises, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than AnCaps! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our gold? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one AnCap do?violate the NAP againstthem where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you canviolate the NAP againstthe Statists, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more AnCap beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Weeb. Sports with prax Larvi. And Jeanette Chung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Chung. A tri-county AnCap, Mises Benson, intends to sue the Statist race for stealing our gold, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on AnCap Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Classy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Mises Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? AnCaps have never been afraid to change the world. What about AnCap Columbus? AnCap Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue Statists. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The AnCap community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the AnCap century. You know, they have a Larry King in the Statist world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. gold, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same AnCap? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the Statist race. - Hello. - Hello, AnCap. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Rothbard here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? AnCaps have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of Statist tears, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial Statist tears. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent Animes, pointless praxeology. AnCaps must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the Statists, they won't be able to say, "gold, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a goldAnCap can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Mises? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many Statists don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the AnCap team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Court of New York, Mises AnCap Benson v. the gold Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the AnCaps of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking AnCap! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary AnCap. gold's pretty important to me. It's important to all AnCaps. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our gold, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of gold Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own goldburton and Honron! Yes, they provide AnCapkeepers for our farms. AnCapkeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any AnCap-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free AnCaps. You keep AnCaps. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of gold. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill AnCaps! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of AnCap culture casually stolen by a Statist for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless AnCaps so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Mises. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Mises was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? AnCaps have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Mises borrow your razor for his bowtie. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old Anime stash. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of Statist tears. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like gold! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little AnCap! And he happens to be the nicest AnCap I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking AnCaps, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Mises Benson AnCap to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about AnCaps. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson AnCap, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen an AnCap documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the AnCap children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Mises... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate AnCap, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing AnCaps! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Rothbard, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a brained beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Rothbard, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the goldAnCaps versus the Statist race took a pointed turn against the AnCaps yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to violate the NAP against someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the Statists do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Rothbard, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Could you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. AnCaps don't smoke. Right. AnCaps don't smoke. AnCaps don't smoke! But some AnCaps are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. AnCaps are trained to prax haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's an AnCap smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a prax, let alone an AnCap. Look at what has happened to AnCaps who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as gold slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these AnCaps! Free the AnCaps! Free the AnCaps! Free the AnCaps! Free the AnCaps! Free the AnCaps! The court finds in favor of the AnCaps! Ayn Rand, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the gold will finally belong to the AnCaps. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Mises, how much gold is out there? All right. One at a time. Mises, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the AnCap way a long time, 27 million years. Congratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all AnCap work camps. Then we want back the gold that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate AnCap-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of gold in bogus health products and la-dee-da Statist tea-time snack garnishments. Can't breathe.
submitted by Cuddlyaxe to Jreg [link] [comments]

[Discussion] AAS induced hypogonadism and an appeal to the community

Tldr; AAS induced hypogonadism is a very real consequence of steroid use, and the wiki needs to be updated to state this fact clearly and without bias so that prospective users who find TRT (for life) an unacceptable consequence can make an informed decision. Also, lots of people, and some are experienced users, have demonstrated that they don't believe this is a thing.

Before I begin, I want to qualify myself a bit as I am asking that we address something together and make a change to the wiki. I am a 30 year old who has been into weight lifting since I was 15, and I had a keen interest in AAS that led me to my first cycle at 24. I'm on TRT. I have a BS in biochemistry and although that is not inherently relevant, it did give me a tendency to research topics I was unfamiliar with, and to do so in peer-reviewed sources.
Over the last 10 years, AAS use has exploded in popularity. It amazes me sometimes when I show up at the gym and see clearly enhanced lifters all around. Bitcoin has made AAS accessible to anyone with a mailbox; for very low prices you can have any major steroid in the bodybuilding world shipped to you in a week or less, and you don't even need to go to the dark web to find it. You don't need to know a guy. This surge in new users has clearly diluted the atmosphere of online steroid forums, whose members used to be very scrutinizing and against anyone hopping on gear if they seemed even slightly uninformed of the ins and outs.
While I think its overall a good thing that the tone has become more welcoming, since people are going to do their thing regardless, I have noticed that we've collectively been skating over something that didn't used to happen as often. That thing is AAS-induced hypogonadism. In the past 4-5 months I cannot count the number of times I have informed a newcomer that recovery not only wasn't guaranteed, but multiple cycles and years of use make TRT a VERY real outcome. Now, I know there are many who recover from years of use, the majority. That is great. But there are no studies that I can find that show what percentage do and don't, or what parameters are involved. I only have the experience of my many friends, people on these kinds of forums, an endocrinologist, and myself to go on and I can say that there are a lot of us walking around who are on TRT because of our AAS use. Literature overwhelmingly supports this.
The wiki itself states that length of suppression, the types of drugs used, and individual response are factors in determining HPTA recovery. It states that failure to do a proper pct "will present a very high probability of long-term endocrine damage" without saying anything about the possibility of not recovering even after you do everything right, giving the false impression that a pct will get everyone back to normal. The individual response paragraph discerns between users who will recovery easily and those who will have "extreme difficulty recovering" but makes no concession anywhere that there is a third category: those who's test levels never fully return to baseline. The HPTA was never designed to be fully suppressed and brought back, there is no situation where exogenous hormones would ever exist in any time during our evolution. The pituitary sends a message to the balls to make more test when it dips a bit, and then tells them to stop when it reaches a max. Small changes. Dumping hormones into your body causes a hijacking of that entire system and crashes it. The pituitary goes silent, your balls stop producing test, stop making sperm, shrink. They literally atrophy from disuse and revert back to being as useless as they were before puberty. Recovery from that is not a given. After my 3rd cycle, my test values returned to normal but my balls felt a tad smaller, my libido a bit off. My 4th cycle's pct failed, as did the 3 other pcts I attempted over the next 1.5 years. HCG runs, pharma pcts of varying lengths, but no matter what 2-3 months after pct I would dip down. I had lost 40% of my natural production and at the 2 year mark with no improvement I decided to do TRT. For me, it wasnt that huge of a deal because I love this lifestyle and knew I wanted to continue to cycle. But there are guys out there who may find this outcome unacceptable and should really make this the number 1 consideration in whether they cycle or not.
I made this post because I have been met with skepticism many of the times I have pointed out the possibility of not recovering. Someone today called it a myth on the same comment thread that he was giving a new guy advice on. Another guy last month PMed me to let me know he was thankful I had brought it up in a comment thread where a guy was asking about the chances of not recovering and 4-5 people were encouraging him that doing a pct and enough time off would prevent that. I get it, we don't like to think about it. Everyone, when they started, worried a bit about their natural levels coming back since everyone was so adamant about checking via bloodwork, but we seem to have calmed that down by carrying on that a proper pct is King and will set things right. The truth is, there are many people on and off these forums with AAS-induced hypogonadism and I am concerned about the numbers who are happily cycling not knowing their next pct is going to fail. While there is no guarantee, a test cycle will most likely go fine. But when people get into the territory of their 3rd, 4th, 5th cycles, more powerful drugs, BnC, they are most likely not going to leave with the test levels they came in with. For many, it will be severe enough of a dip to warrant TRT, others will suffer minor sides and just go on with life, and some will probably struggle for year with it. I visited an endocrinologist recently because I want to stop self prescribing and he told me he deals with this all the time, that its very common.
I don't really know how changes get made to the wiki, but I propose that we make it a very large disclaimer at the top of the PCT section and in the 500mg test cycle section. Below are just a few sources I found over a very short time. I suggest you look further if you need more evidence. I am not a gatekeeper and never will be, but if we transmit any information to a prospective user about how to take these drugs safely it should come with this fact. Discuss.

Coward RM, Rajanahally S, Kovac JR, Smith RP, Pastuszak AW, Lipshultz LI. Anabolic steroid induced hypogonadism in young men. The Journal of urology. 2013;190(6):2200–5. Epub 2013/06/15. doi: 10.1016/j.juro.2013.06.010 pmid:23764075.

Rahnema CD, Lipshultz LI, Crosnoe LE, Kovac JR, Kim ED. Anabolic steroid-induced hypogonadism: diagnosis and treatment. Fertil Steril. 2014;101(5):1271–9. Epub 2014/03/19. doi: 10.1016/j.fertnstert.2014.02.002 pmid:24636400.

Tan RS, Scally MC. Anabolic steroid-induced hypogonadism—towards a unified hypothesis of anabolic steroid action. Med Hypotheses. 2009;72(6):723–8. Epub 2009/02/24. doi: 10.1016/j.mehy.2008.12.042 pmid:19231088.

van Breda E, Keizer HA, Kuipers H, Wolffenbuttel BH. Androgenic anabolic steroid use and severe hypothalamic-pituitary dysfunction: a case study. International journal of sports medicine. 2003;24(3):195–6. Epub 2003/05/13. doi: 10.1055/s-2003-39089 pmid:12740738.

Boregowda K, Joels L, Stephens JW, Price DE. Persistent primary hypogonadism associated with anabolic steroid abuse. Fertil Steril. 2011;96(1):e7–8. Epub 2011/05/18. doi: 10.1016/j.fertnstert.2011.04.029 pmid:21575947.

Jarow JP, Lipshultz LI. Anabolic steroid-induced hypogonadotropic hypogonadism. Am J Sports Med. 1990;18(4):429–31. Epub 1990/07/01. pmid:2403193.

Lloyd FH, Powell P, Murdoch AP. Anabolic steroid abuse by body builders and male subfertility. BMJ. 1996;313(7049):100–1. Epub 1996/07/13. pmid:8688713; PubMed Central PMCID: PMC2351471.

Kanayama G, Hudson JI, DeLuca J, Isaacs S, Baggish A, Weiner R, et al. Prolonged hypogonadism in males following withdrawal from anabolic-androgenic steroids: an under-recognized problem. Addiction. 2015;110(5):823–31. Epub 2015/01/20. doi: 10.1111/add.12850 pmid:25598171; PubMed Central PMCID: PMC4398624.

Kanayama G, Hudson JI, Pope HG Jr. Long term psychiatric and medical consequences of anabolic androgenic steroid abuse: a looming public health concern. Drug Alcohol Depend. 2008 Nov 1;98(1-2):1-12. doi: 10.1016/j.drugalcdep. 2008.05.004. Epub 2008 Jul 2. Review. PMID: 18599224
EDIT: does anyone know how we even go about modifying the wiki? What’s the process?
submitted by benchpressyourfeels to steroids [link] [comments]

Adrafinil vs Modafinil - The Definitive Reddit Guide

What is Modafinil?


Modafinil is a eugeroic – or, simply, a wakefulness-promoting agent – with a primary purpose of combating narcolepsy amongst suffers. Eugeroics differ from other stimulants because they are considered relatively non-addictive. This means that they do not cause the typical side effects experienced with most stimulants, like agitation and nervousness.
Let us first discuss the chemical components of Modafinil. It is a racemic mixture, and such mixtures have equal amounts of left- and right-handed enantiomers. Enantiomers are the two forms in which large numbers of chemicals exist. Both forms are chemically and structurally identical, yet are nevertheless mirror images of the other. In other words, enantiomers are the ‘left’ and ‘right’ versions of a drug. These are called S and R enantiomers. One enantiomer is typically responsible for the majority of a drug’s effects, while the other can contribute to those positive effects. In other cases, the less dominant enantiomer can cause adverse side effects, or it be inert.
Interestingly Modafinil Most racemic mixtures are balanced equally. This means half of the mixture is ‘left’ enantiomer and the other half is ‘right’. Modafinil is an equal combination of its S- and R- enantiomers, meaning that both have a psychoactive function. Just as you sometimes need two hands to do a job correctly, Modafinil uses both of its enantiomers to provide the ideal effect on body and mind.
Preliminary scientific evidence has found that Modafinil works through histamine signaling. This phrase might indeed baffle you if you aren’t familiar with biological terminology. What this essentially means is that the histamine receptors, found for example in the central nervous system, are provoked. Michael J Minzenberg and Cameron S Carter’s journal provides ample scientific research on Modafinil’s neurochemical actions and effects.
Histamine acts a neurotransmitter, a chemical substance which is released at the end of a nerve fibre by the arrival of a nerve impulse. Neurotransmitters affect the transfer of the impulse to another nerve fibre, muscle fibre, or some other structure within the body. Modafinil enhances histamine activity by stimulating the central system. This increased activity therefore impacts other nerve fibres/muscle fibres in the body, accounting for its ability to stimulate a fatigued body.
As well as fighting tiredness, Modafinil also improves general mood and well-being amongst users, with positive improvements seen with mental focus, analytic capability and memory recall and retention.
Britain deems Modafinil a prescription-only drug. In America, meanwhile, Modafinil’s brand name is Provigil. It is considered a scheduled drug, meaning that it necessitates a prescription in order to obtain it legally.

What is Adrafinil?


Adrafinil is a pro-drug to Modafinil. This simply means that supplementation of it increases concentrations of Modafinil in the body. The liver changes Adrafinil to Modafinil.
Similarly to Modafinil, Adrafinil’s cognitive benefits are enhanced by noted improvements in day-time alertness, motivation, mood and energy levels. It also does not generate the irritability, anxiousness and nervousness routinely experienced through the use of other stimulants.
Britain does not measure Adrafinil under the Misuse of Drugs Act 1971, a legislation that governs the regulation of drugs. This means that it is not regulated. Adrafinil’s legal status and nootropics in general, nevertheless remains in grey area. It is lawful for purchase by British residents, but only for personal use. In the U.S, however, the drug is currently legal and can be bought, prescription free, as an alternative to Modafinil. Though its manufactured moniker Olmifon was discontinued in 2011, Adrafinil itself can still be purchased easily online.

Why do they differ?

Modafinil and Adrafinil are two of the most popular stimulants available. Though both offer similar if not identical cognitive benefits, there are key distinctions between both.
Chemically speaking, the structures of both drugs are very similar:

Adrafinil Structure
It is, however, with the body’s processing of each drug that differences become most apparent. Modafinil is processed through metabolic activity occurring mainly in the liver. Lesser contributions to the metabolising process are made through the activity of the enzyme cytochrome P450 (CYP). Cytochrome p-450 (often abbreviated “CYP”) is a class of enzymes that is involved in the metabolism of many medications and is located primarily in the liver.
But, what exactly are enzymes? They exist in living organisms and catalyze specific biochemical reactions within the body. At the beginning of a reaction process, molecules exist called ‘substrates’. The enzyme converts these into ‘products’. All metabolic processes in cells require enzymes to react within the body at rates fast enough to sustain life.
Adrafinil differs because it is changed into Modafinil in the liver. This means that it relies on greater enzyme activity to process correctly and efficiently.
The conversion process of Adrafinil and Modafinil sees the former breaking down into the latter as a compound. This is how it is metabolized. Enzymes are relied upon more during the metabolic process of Adrafinil. As mentioned briefly in the metabolism of Modafinil, the enzyme involved in metabolizing Adrafinil when it reaches the liver is Cytochrome p-450.
How quickly the liver is able to convert Adrafinil is dependent upon metabolic rate and the efficiency of the liver overall. Two people of the same sex, similar age and weight can take the same dose of Adrafinil but achieve very different results.
In necessitating a more rigorous metabolism process, the most profound difference between Modafinil and Adrafinil is that the latter requires the greater use of Cytochrome p-450. Over time, if the drug is not taken cyclically, such enzymes can build up in the liver with potentially damaging effects on the organ as a whole.

Adrafinil vs Modafinil Dosage


For Adrafinil, it as advised to dose between 600 to 1200mg per day. It is further advised, as with the majority of supplements, to begin on a low dose, only increasing the amount after recognizing your own body’s reaction and tolerance. Adrafinil should not be taken in the afternoon and evening to prevent a sleepless night. Ideally, it should be taken 3 times a week and for no longer than five months. This is primarily to prevent side effects, tolerance and the build-up of enzymes in the liver.
Examine.com state that Adrafinil’s recommended dosage range is vast, ranging from 600 to 1,200mg. BodhiSvaha on erowid.org explained their willingness to take both small doses and larger ones of Adrafinil:
After extensive experimentation with dosage, I have settled on taking 300mg when I wake up and another 300 mg in the early afternoon. There does not seem to be much, if any, habituation or tolerance created by Adrafinil. Occasionally I will take doses up to 1200 mg when a high degree of concentration is required. I have found this dose to be very effective at potentiating and improving the tryptamine experience, in particular. I find tryps sometimes bring a feeling of lethargy or body load with some cognitive dullness. Adrafinil counters this effect very nicely.
Here it is evident that, despite there being a large range of recommended doses for Adrafinil, all of them are safe. Whatever you choose within that range is dependent on your desired alertness and bodily tolerance. Reddit user ssitimefill explains the necessity of slowly upping Adrafinil dosage, as well as suggesting why a higher dose than Modafinil is required:
To my knowledge it is not established how what proportion of adrafinil is broken down into modafinil and what proportion into modafinilic acid. This proportion likely varies person to person, and also by dose. Some studies have reported adrafinil more potent at lower doses. The general psychological effect of adrafinil depends not only on the quantity converted into modafinil but the rate of this conversion. 300 mg of modafinil from adrafinil is not likely to produce an identical effect from 300 mg of modafinil. Basically there is no way to determine optimum dose of adrafinil other than trial and error. The best procedure is to start with low doses (measured via scale) and slowly increase dose until you reach the optimal, then sub-optimal dose. When you have reached sub-optimal dose (too much adrafinil) you can deduce what dose is optimal for you.
Because Modafinil does not transform in the liver, it generally requires lesser dosage to reach its optimum effect. Modafinil is typically sold in 100 mg or 200 mg tablets. The latter option is more popular due to its greater availability. 200 mg is indeed the recommended dose, to be taken once per day, usually during the morning. It may be taken with or without food. (nootriment.com)
Some recommend starting with an initial intake of 100 mg Modafinil dosage. This helps with accustoming the body to the drug itself. An anonymous writer on erowid.org posted his first use of 100mg Modafinil, describing its positive effects:
And today I tried modafinil 100 mg for the first time. I took it at around 10:45 AM today and it is now 4:35 PM. My experience has been much like those of others herein described– initial buzziness (~1 hr after I took the pill) that lasted about as long. But for the past 4 hours, I have been just plain awake. I have not succumbed to the usual desire to take a nap in the afternoons despite the near-90-degree heat, which usually puts me right to sleep. I have had no such desire in fact. I am not jittery or having unusual thoughts, etc.
It is also possible to take higher doses. Up to 400 mg per day has been shown to be very well-tolerated. Pino on drugs-forum tried a variety of dosages and provides some succinct information of the results:
Combinations:
200 mg modafinil + caffeine: Pleasant vibe, easy and fast thinking. Able to solve sudokus a lot quicker. The bus driver becomes more self reassured in conversations and is able to focus more than 16 hours. Sleep quality is ok. (bp: 130/80) 200 mg modafinil + too much caffeine (4 cups of coffee): Anxiousness and some hypertension kicks in here. (bp: 140/93) Concentration is less than optimal in this region. 400 mg modafinil + normal caffeine: Nice euphoria, but can also turn into anxiousness.
It is clear that the recommended doses are speculative and dependent on personal accounts of drug use. There are certainly more user reviews around the internet that explain individual experiences of alternating dosage amounts. There is, of course, still the question of the differences in dosage between Modafinil and Adrafinil. Jjhurley on Reddit discussed the differences in dosage between both:
… most people tell me 300mg of adra is comparable to just 100mg of moda. Whether your ratio or this other ratio is correct doesn’t make too much a difference, but I have been taking 600mg of adra and don’t want to lose any potency. Is this to say I should go with 300-400mg of moda? If so, that’s a little upsetting because I was really hoping to have equal, if not better, experiences on just 200mg of moda.
ProfWiki agreed that Adrafinil should be taken in higher dosages than Modafinil:
I take 600 mg in order to get effects. This is equivalent to about 200 mg of modafinil. I think throwf0 read you as saying modafinil since he mentioned modafinil. Modafinil is a lot stronger than adrafinil. 150 mg of adrafinil would be about like 50 mg of adrafinil. Anyway, like I said, 50 mg of Adrafinil is far too lose to be effective. 50 mg of MODAfinil might work okay for some but they typically are just breaking up a standard 100/200 mg dose. Being that Adrafinil works by metabolizing into Modafinil, and that as a rule of thumb 1/3 of Adrafinil turns into modafinil, a 50 mg dose of Adrafinil would be just roughly 16-17 mg of modafinil. There wouldn’t be any effects from such a low level dose.

Adrafinil vs Provigil


Let us first make one distinction:
Adrafinil = generic drug Provigil = brand name of Modafinil
It is often questioned what the difference between Provigil and Adrafinil is. However, the former is simply a branded name for the generic drug Modafinil, which, as we have now found, is the metabolite of Adrafinil. So long as users are acquiring pure generic versions of Adrafinil, then the same effects as Provigil will be felt and the advised dosage will essentially be identical.
It is therefore not unusual for potential users to question the differences between Provigil and Adrafinil. Moreover, it is certainly not unreasonable to question their differences. For instance, internet user Shatneresque questioned the difference between Modafinil and Provigil, which are the same drug, asking:
My pharmacy sent me a email saying I can now replace my Provigil ($125 a month) with the generic version and they need my okay to do so. Before I say yes and say the money, I want to know if anyone has noticed any differences. I am very happy with the provigil and have been taking it for several years.
This query was answered by Serpens:
It appears that Cephalon, the maker of Provigil, has been purchased by Teva, titan generic manufacturer. There are currently three manufacturers selling a generic labeled ‘modafinil’ : Cephalon (brand holder), Teva, and Par. All three are using the same brand name NDA license on file with the FDA. In addition, Elsevier’s Clinical Pharmacology has images and references available for the generic product being shipped for all three drug companies. They’re all the same pill. Images of all three products show a white oblong tablet with “Provigil” on one side, and the strength on the other. All products have the same inactive ingredients.
Queries like this prove that caution is imperative when deciding on which supplement to use. This is especially true if you are a first time user or are, like Shatneresque, accustomed to using one particular brand such as Provigil. Researching alternatives and finding the most information about whatever drug you are choosing is vital if you are to select the right one for you. Awareness is the key and there is no harm in asking questions that, to you, may sound obvious once they are answered.

About Provigil


Provigil was originally manufactured by Cephalon, the same company behind the previously branded version of Adrafinil (Olmifon). Business editor Dell Poncet writes of how, in 1999, interest for both Cephalon and Provigil was taking off, with registered quarterly sales of $10.7 million. Being among the leading biopharmaceutical companies in the world, Cephalon flourished. In 2011, it was acquired by Teva, the largest generic drug manufacturer in the world for a huge $6.8 billion (read more here). There is little surprise, then, that Provigil is sold at quite a cost.
A 30-day supply of Provigil 200mg pills can cost as much as $1500. Buyers in the UK can therefore expect to pay even more if the pharmacy offers world-wide shipping.
Since branded Modafinil is so expensive, Adrafinil is clearly the best alternative. The latter drug does not come attached to a manufactured title, and is inexpensive yet easily attainable. What is more, it can be bought prescription-free online or by phone. There are plenty of legitimate outlets stocking Adrafinil and these can be accessed at the click of a button. If economizing is one aspect of importance, then Adrafinil is certainly the best choice.

Modafinil in India


More importantly health-wise, though, is the scary possibility of purchasing a dodgy-version of branded Modafinil online. With the cost of Provigil being so high, it is unsurprising that many prospective users look for a cheaper alternative for their first time trying the drug. Many turn to the internet’s grey market, where there is a lingering risk of being ripped off with tampered drugs. This is where extra caution and care should be applied.
Once users began contemplating off-label equivalents, international pharmacy websites quickly took the opportunity to sell these kinds of drugs. The most popular location from which many internet users buy unbranded Modafinil is India. Sources of the drug in India do not require strict quality control, nor are prescriptions required by users.
In fact, there is much information to be considered with regard to India’s counterfeit drugs market. This article on New York Times discusses how:
India’s drug industry is one of the country’s most important economic engines, exporting $15 billion in products annually, and some of its factories are world-class, virtually undistinguishable from their counterparts in the West. But others suffer from serious quality control problems. The World Health Organization estimated that one in five drugs made in India are fakes. A 2010 survey of New Delhi pharmacies found that 12 percent of sampled drugs were spurious.
Meanwhile, this article on safemedsonline.org attests to the New York Times’ discussion, stating that:
The Food and Drug Administration recently conducted a series of raids in India to uncover counterfeit drugs. The raids yielded large quantities of substandard medicines and resulted in several arrests. However, in India, the penalties for making and selling counterfeit medicines are minimal, the convictions are rare, and the profits are enormous. Since the raids late last year, the problem has only gotten worse.
Alarm bells should definitely ring here. Without quality control, many drugs that appear on international websites do not contain legitimate ingredients. It is a huge gamble to assume your purchased pills are pure or authentic. There’s a great possibility that you might not experience the proper effects of the medication and there is serious potential that you may have toxic reactions to the ingredients in fake versions of the drug. Some websites and online Nootropics communities maintain lists of verified and trustworthy Modafinil vendors, but such vendors do not generally stay on the lists for long. In many cases, a trusted supplier can end up sending out a fake or ineffective batch of pills even after you have developed a long-standing relationship with them. It is almost impossible to protect against this risk.
There is really only one sensible alternative if you find the price of Provigil unreasonable, or if you are contemplating buying potentially contaminated off-label versions from India. Users should purchase Adrafinil from a reputable supplier instead, rather than paying the very serious costs of purchasing from an unreliable source abroad.

Adrafinil vs Modafinil forum


There are many reviews across the internet on individual preferences: Adrafinil or Modafinil. It is all, of course, subjective to user experience. Whilst some remain skeptical towards the newer of the two drugs, Adrafinil, there are huge amounts of successful reviews to be considered. On reddit, jjhurley writes:
Long story short, today is just my 3rd day using adrafinil and I’m impressed with the results so far. I keep reading from people who’ve experienced both adra & moda is that they prefer modafinil. To me it is surprising there would be a whole lot of difference given what we know about adrafinil converting to modafinil once in your system. I understand the conversion takes time but I wouldn’t think that to make a significant impact to different effects.
It is also important to remember that Adrafinil is converted into Modafinil once in the liver. Many users therefore experience the same results with both drugs, and are positive in their opinions of both. DoyouknowmyPW on Reddit concurs, stating that:
I’ve been using Adrafinil and Modafinil for a few weeks now during the workweek. 100-150mg for Modafinil, 200-270 for Adrafinil. I’ve never noticed any painful side-effects, might just be a coincidence. Sharp pain like that could be trapped gas (of course I am not a physician though!). It does help greatly staying more alert during the day. Before I would have issues some days where I am truly struggling to keep my eyes open, especially during meetings. I’ve fallen asleep at least twice for a brief second because my eyes were just too heavy. Since I’ve been taking the morning dose that sleepiness has gone away and I am now on a better sleep schedule because I feel tired when I’m suppose to.
Some users speak of branded versions of the drugs. For example, Akoward on drugs-forum writes:
Recently got a hold of some Nuvigil. Have had previous experience with Olmifon (Adrafinil). As has been said before its much more potent at lower dose that Adrafinil. I only need 1/2 a pill to do what 2x300mg Adrafinils were doing for me. I took a whole Nuvigil the first time and was more productive in that single day that I had been in ages. Got all my work done, worked on personal projects… it was amazing. I will say that some of the physical side effects were a little troubling (ever present tightness in the collarbone to middle neck area, massive restless legs)
It is important to see that with Akoward’s review, despite him alternating to the branded Armodafinil, side-effects were still experienced. This goes to show that Adrafinil, though not manufactured under a moniker, is no less competent in generating the excellent results that might be expected from those drugs which sound more ‘professional’.

Adrafinil vs Modafinil vs Armodafinil


Like Adrafinil and Modafinil, Armodafinil is a stimulant used to combat fatigue. Introduced in 2007, Armodafinil appears under brand names such as Nuvigil, Artvigil, and Waklert. It is purportedly more effective at lower doses than its relatives Adrafinil and Modafinil.
Armodafinil is an enantiopure drug. Enantiopure drugs contain only one of the enantiomers (spoken about earlier), R or S. The R enantiomer is longer acting and is most responsible for the effects of Modafinil specifically. Since the S enantiomer is not as strong, Armodafinil’s dosage is therefore lower. Most doses are 150mg compared to Modafinil’s 200mg standard dose.
Whilst the effects last for roughly the same time, Armodafinil takes longer to reach its peak than Modafinil, and therefore even longer than Adrafinil. This is simply because the S enantiomer reacts and leaves the body faster. Remember, Armodafinil does not have the S enantiomer, whereas Modafinil does. Adrafinil does, too, because Modafinil is a component within it. Because of this, users find that the effects of Armodafinil take longer to make themselves apparent – a potential disadvantage for prospective users.
So, how is Armodafinil processed? Dopamine is a compound existing as neurotransmitter within the body. It is also precursor of other substances including adrenaline. Armodafinil is an indirect dopamine receptor agonist. What this essentially means, then, is that Armodafinil provokes the dopamine levels in the body.
Armodafinil is metabolized in much the similar way as Modafinil. It relies on amide hydrolysis primarily, and enzyme activity from by cytochrome P450 secondly. Amide Hydrolysis refers to the reaction with water of amides – a compound)
As a consequence, this means that is does not rely as much on heavy enzyme activity in the liver. Adrafinil does. This presents further difference that may be considered by potential users. However, it is important to remember to stick to dosage guidance. If taken properly, and often cyclically, Adrafinil is no more threatening to the liver than Modafinil or Armodafinil.
Because Armodafinil, Modafinil and Adrafinil are all very similar in terms of effect, there is much discussion about which is the best. With regard to Modafinil and Armodafinil specifically, some may assume that because small dosages are needed for the latter that it is more efficient. However, it is important to remember individual sensitivity levels. Different drugs can have different reactions for different people. Potency is therefore not the only factor; the personal experience of using either Armodafinil or Modafinil is equally important. A trial and error approach may be necessary, but, of course, extensive research to find the best possible supplement for you is paramount.
In undertaking research, then, you may discover information that suits your needs. For example, it is proposed that, unlike Modafinil, Armodafinil will not actually disturb your existing sleep patterns. Modafinil users might agree a good night’s sleep is difficult to achieve depending on the dosage.
Reddit user guitar1560 states that
I took 50mg two days in a row twice. Couldn’t sleep well the second night both times
Whereas SequenceConvenience writes
I’ve experienced pretty strong sleep changes while taking modafinil, but nothing that has been negative. I actually seem to need less sleep, at least in the sense that it is very easy for me to get out of bed the day after taking modafinil. Then again, I also don’t seem to have much in the way of dreams during those nights.
Armodafinil does not impact sleep pattern. However, with SequenceConvenience’s review, it is clear that some find this a positive effect of Modafinil while others, like guitar1560, may be disappointed.
Respective costs of the drugs might further influence your decision. KimberCT on Longe City tried both Armodafinil and Modafinil, but was swayed somewhat by the price of Nuvigil (the branded name of Armodafinil):
Currently taking 250mg armodafinil daily. To be honest, I kind of prefer modafinil. It seems to have a little more of a quick kick to it. Probably that isomer with a short half life peaking. Other than that, I can’t tell the difference between Nuvigil and modafinil (Sun Pharma). I’d probably have continued taking modafinil, but Cephalon has jacked the price since Nuvigil was FDA approved. With an Rx, Provigil is twice the price of Nuvigil. Their way of getting everyone onto Nuvigil before Provigil’s patent expires.
Adrafinil, meanwhile, can be obtained very cheaply online because it does not exist under a manufactured name. Nevertheless, many of these drugs are safe to use even if they lack a moniker like Provigil or Nuvigil. To stop concerns of the legitimacy of your purchased drug, always ask that your online manufacturer provides a COA (Certificate of Authenticity) on demand. This means that the substance batch has undergone a third-party laboratory analysis to ensure that your purchased drug matches its label and is not contaminated.
A common side-effect of Adrafinil is that the urine can smell different after ingestion of the drug. This is because one of Adrafinil’s metabolites contains a sulphur-based compound, and sulphur is strong smelling in itself.
However, these criticisms are not limited to Adrafinil alone and it should not sway potential users away from this particular drug. Modafinil has also been found to change the odor of urine. For example, PhysicsMaestro on Longe city queries:
I’ve been using modafinil (modalert) for about 8 months now, and regularly noticed a distinct smell of my urine whenever taking it. However, with this armodafinil, I don’t seem to notice it, which worries me a bit (i.e., not really what it states to be). Has anyone else noticed this difference between armodafinil and modafinil? I thought maybe the S-enantiomer could be metabolized and excreted quicker, thus resulting in an early onset smell, but I am just guessing.
Jadamgo answered:
The difference could easily be due to one of the excipients of the tablet, not the active ingredient. It’s also possible that only the S-enantiomer causes the smell, and of course, there’s the possibility that either these pills or the old ones didn’t actually contain modafinil. Sometimes they contain caffeine or dimethylamylamine or other stimulants, either mixed with modafinil or completely replacing it.
PhysicsMaestro thereafter concurrs:
I thought the odorous urine was ubiquitous to all variants of modafinil, resulting from its metabolites. But I guess the smell could be dependent on the enantiomer. I am willing to assume that whatever enzyme metabolizes modafinil to modafinil acid would leave its chirality intact. I don’t think it would be the excipients since the smell is so widely reported with different sources (and the modafinil has a sulfiyl group, so)
Nor does Armodafinil escape the urine issues. An anonymous writer on Erowid.org wrote:
Oh, and the pill tastes awful. Don’t let it get stuck in your mouth. And my pee starts to smell like it, too, but I get used to it
It is therefore important not to be selective of criticism based on what drug you have been swayed by. If you read that Modafinil is apparently “safer” because it does not rely on rampant enzyme activity, then do remember to include other issues such as cost-efficiency and, of course, other side-effects that might become more apparent than rare liver problems. These side-effects might include nausea, chest-pain or a faster heart rate (nhs.uk).
Adrafinil stands out as the most cost-effective, and, though it has been reported to alter urine odor, it is not alone. Modafinil, the more expensive, and Armodafinil, with a longer reaction time, also generate similar side-effects.
As well as reviews on specific effects of Adrafinil, Armodafinil or Modafinil, there are plenty of general overviews to be found around the internet. On Reddit, BitcoinOperatedGirl writes of her experience:
I tried the adrafinil first, starting with a low dose of 200mg one morning. I prepared a capsule and put it in a baggie next to my pillow before I went to sleep. When my alarm clock rang in the morning, I swallowed the capsule, silenced the alarm clock, and went back to sleep. I was expecting the stimulatory effect to eventually wake me up, as a caffeine pill would, but I ended up sleeping for two more hours. I felt a little disappointed after getting up and not feeling any stimulation, so I decided to add an extra 400mg to the mix. The rest of the day, I was in a fairly good mood. I thought that I was maybe a little more energetic and motivated than usual. I was fairly productive and I worked out. The effect wasn’t what I expected, however. I’ve read people on here talking about feeling wired, and “laser beam focus”, but a whole 600mg of adrafinil felt nothing close to what I imagined (I guess I imagined it would feel like a mild dose of ritalin or something). On the upside, I experienced no substantial anxiety, whereas all the amphetamine-like drugs make me very uncomfortably anxious (I really can’t stand them, they feel disgusting to me). I didn’t really feel a crash and I went to bed at my normal hour. I’m experimenting with adrafinil again today. I took 800mg this time. I was feeling particularly tired this morning (cripplingly tired, lethargic really). I definitely feel more energetic now. I’ve gotten some work done, I’m feeling the drive to write walls of text on reddit and I’m going to have a workout in a few minutes. I don’t expect to have any motivational issues today. Maybe I’ll even cook something fun. Only unfortunate side-effect seems to be a mild headache, but advil seems to be taking care of that. I also tried armodafinil a week ago. Took a small 75mg dose in the morning. Same setup as with adrafinil. I also fell back to sleep for 2 hours. I felt pretty anxious that day and also got a headache. I can’t quite be sure the armodafinil is to blame but I suspect it is. Seems much more anxiety-inducing than adrafinil, which is unfortunate given that it seems adrafinil is worse for your liver. Armodafinil is probably just not for me.
Nezxon on LongeCity meanwhile states that:
I’m taking 75mg Adrafinil (Olmifon) twice daily and I haven’t experienced any side effects. I’d like to give Armodafinil a try, perhaps even safer in the long-term than Modafinil is.
These kinds of reviews certainly help to build a solid picture of each drug’s story. Undertaking research like this to decide on which drug is preferable to you is definitely something you should embark on before picking at random a supplement based on one review.

Adrafinil vs Modafinil reddit


The only notable difference in reviews between Modafinil and Adrafinil is that the latter takes longer to take effect. For example, justmodz1 stated that:
adrafinil is the precursor of modafinil in that it came first and led to the discovery of modafinil in fact adrafinil turns into modafinil in the body due to breakdown of it molecules which actually means that the two have the same effects but adrafinil takes longer to take effect.
While KPC100 agreed that:
Adrafinil gets turned into Modafinil in your system. Because of this, you need a much larger dose and it takes longer to take effect.
Although it does have a longer reaction time, this certainly shouldn’t be a downfall of Adrafinil. It is simply a case that Adrafinil’s chemical processing takes a little longer. However, once complete, the results are just as effective as those found with Modafinil. Take into consideration, also, that Adrafinil will certainly stimulate, energize and ultimately shake you awake. The seemingly longer period of time before this happens will soon become irrelevant when the benefits are reaped. Further Reddit reviews compare other aspects of Adrafinil and Modafinil.
Jjhurley, commenting on the actual nature of each drug, states that:
I keep reading from people who’ve experienced both adra & moda is that they prefer modafinil. To me it is surprising there would be a whole lot of difference given what we know about adrafinil converting to modafinil once in your system. I understand the conversion takes time but I wouldn’t think that to make a significant impact to different effects.
While the same user goes on to discuss issues of costing, in the end suggesting that, in terms of price, they would definitely prefer Adrafinil:
I was really hoping to have equal, if not better, experiences on just 200mg of moda. The reason I’d like to not take more than that is simply cost. At $1.50-2.00 per 200mg pill of moda (prices based off the quantities I’d be ordering as well as variation in supplier prices) it’s too costly to have to take twice that for my own personal budget. To be honest, even at $1.50-2.00 per pill/200mg is already high for my budget. I can get 50g of adrafinil for $98 which comes out to up to 50% cheaper a single moda dose/pill of 200mg. If conversion ratios are right and I’d need two pills or 400mg of moda though then my adra would be 75% cheaper.
There are plenty of important aspects to consider when choosing between Modafinil or Adrafinil. Firstly, selecting the safest and most reliable drug should be of paramount interest. Whereas Adrafinil is often tested by third parties and is shipped nationally rather than across sees, Modafinil (both branded and unbranded versions) is often left untested and sent from India. Quality control is a big issue of concern for international pharmacies and should definitely guide your final decision.
Pricing is also important to consider. Although you might think you’re getting a better deal by choosing a cheaper off-label version from India, it is still not as easy to buy Modafinil as it is Adrafinil. Most venders of Modafinil do not accept Paypal. This service offers secure buyer protection. With the option of a legitimate, nationally supplied alternative in Adrafinil, it is illogical to risk your bank account details instead – just to purchase a drug that will likely be contaminated and unsafe
submitted by Ximena556677 to NootropicsTalk [link] [comments]

Cryptocurrencies and the circle of competence

A quick note to investors that believe the intrinsic value of bitcoin is 0 because they can't do a DCF on it: this isn't the place to argue with me about it. I suggest you read a bit more about what it actually is (hint: not a currency). I've defended its value in plenty of other posts on this sub. It's a $40+ billion market, so at least a few people agree with me. I welcome you to short the crypto of your choice if you think it's worth nothing. This is a post for folks that believe that cryptocurrencies have at least some discernible value and are considering investing in them.
If we have a strength, it is in recognizing when we are operating well within our circle of competence and when we are approaching the perimeter. – Warren Buffett
Given the tripling of the cryptocurrency market cap in the last few months and the 3- to 10-fold increases in virtually every major altcoin, cryptocurrencies like Ethereum and of course Bitcoin have been getting a stunning amount of attention in the press and on this subreddit recently.
If you follow the cryptocurrency world closely, you know that there have been a huge amount of dubious ICOs (initial coin offerings) on the market recently. It's an explosive time in crypto.
It's also a frustrating time for many long term bitcoiners and crypto fans, because we're faced with a barrage of questions from outsiders who see the returns and want to buy in to the "next big thing" and make a quick buck. This is a warning to those people.
Everyone is a genius is a rising market. It's hard to go wrong these days in crypto. Even coins of dubious merit like Ripple, Dogecoin, Stellar, NEM were pumped 5 times without any fundamental change. Speculators/investors have thrown money at crypto indiscriminately and efficient markets have 100% broken down. The altcoin pump right now is roughly comparable to the Dot Com crisis of the early 2000s.
  1. New tech promises to change the world
  2. Investors jump in on hype and promises
  3. A surge of IPOs (ICOs) occurs to capitalize on this
  4. "Greater fool" traders pile in, thinking they can make money even if the underlying is unsound
  5. Analysts claim "this time is different" while seasoned old hands refuse to participate
  6. Tech is proven not to be as developed as everyone thinks, market tanks
  7. Select few decent companies survive, all the trash is destroyed
  8. Tech eventually fulfills expectations, 10 years later, but none of the investors from the early days make money on it
However, canny (and skeptical) investors can still make money on crypto, as cryptocurrencies are inevitable, and will continue to expand and proliferate, even when the altcoin crash comes.
Something to realize first of all is that the crypto market is heterogeneous. It has straightforward cryptocurrencies (bitcoin, litecoin, dash, monero), smart-contract cryptos (ethereum, ethereum classic) and a whole bunch of crypto tokens that follow dedicated platforms (golem, augur, steem). Not mentioned are ripple and stellar because they aren't really cryptocurrencies at all.
The investing theses for all of these categories is radically different. The measure of success for a currency or store of value is adoption, merchant use, low volatility, a large network, and real world acceptance as something worth owning. Bitcoin has this right now, which is why it's more than 50% of the ecosystem, and none of its competitors are even close. Monero, Zcash, and Dash are a special case in that they try and make transactions anonymous and privacy, allowing for use cases on the darknet markets, for instance.
The tech underlying bitcoin is essentially sound, although it is having a scalability crisis, which you should read about. It can't right now serve as a currency which will buy you a cup of coffee - the transaction fees are too high. However if you want to send $200,000 from Mexico to Indonesia or China to the Philippines, you can do it within 20 minutes, and with fees of a few dollars. And if you want to store your wealth in a vault that is totally secure, and cannot be debased by a central bank, bitcoin is a good bet. This is highly relevant to folks in India that just had cash abolished, to Venezuelans, to Argentines, to Cypriots, to Nigerians, anywhere local currencies are weak and volatile. The potential value of a competing cryptocurrency lies in whether it can improve materially on bitcoin, whether it means incorporating off-chain scaling (segwit with litecoin), making it more private and fungible (monero), automating governance (decred), and so on.
Then there are cryptoassets that incorporate smart contracts. These – ethereum and its derivatives – exploded when the SEC denied the Bitcoin ETF back in march and bitcoiners got worried and started diversifying. This is the market segment that is highly risky, even by crypto standards, in my opinion. Ethereum is a protocol that allows contracts to self-enforce. Programming power to run the contracts is paid for with ethereum. Two parties agree to a contract, and it then self-executes. It's secured by a decentralized computing network of ethereum miners, so the contracts cannot be shut down by a government or corporation. It's pretty clever. Last year, a $150+ million contract was drawn up with ethereum, which would act like a venture capital fund, picking good investments just based on the votes of the token holders. This was called a Decentralized Autonomous Organization, and it was hacked before it could do anything. Well, it was exploited based on the code and so the exploit was totally "fair" given that the contract was meant to be inevitable, once agreed to. However, the creators of Ethereum didn't like the idea of losing $50 million, so they decided to collectively agree to amend the rules of the protocol itself (violating "Code is Law"), and jump onto a new one, which they would also call Ethereum, although it was really Ethereum 2.0. Some people got upset by this, because they thought that immutability and not arbitrarily rolling back the code was more important than some investors losing money because of poorly written code. They created Ethereum Classic, which is the original Ethereum chain. This wasn't what the Ethereum 2.0 folks thought would happen, but it did happen, so there are two competing Ethereum chains now.
Eventually, lots of decentralized apps were funded, via tokensales. A development team would say: "we're going to use ethereum to create a decentralized cloud computing/AI/prediction/gambling/timestamping/social media network." And then investors would buy the tokens, expecting that eventually the dev team would deliver, and the tokens would be in demand, since they would be required to use the network. It's a bit like buying in-game-currency when the game is announced, anticipating that the game would be wildly popular and you'd be able to sell it on later at a profit or acquire it cheaply to buy in-game items later on. However, many of us think that the promises are a bit extravagant, and that investors in these ICOs are probably going to lose money. The incentives aren't well aligned. Founders can just not deliver and run off with the money, and there's no regulatory body to enforce that. And for Ethereum more broadly, many people are worried that the turing-completeness of the language will mean it will face serious threats and unforeseeable hacks, like with the DAO. Finally, Ethereum has increased from around $20 to $90 in a matter of months, which raises the question of whether a) the market realized its true value or b) it was pumped on speculation. There's a huge set of unknowns with a smart contract currency, and virtually none of the promised dapps are up and running right now, and the ones that are haven't really attracted large userbases or delivered. This is because the tech is in its infancy, and the developers are still learning how to use it properly. So we won't know if these sorts of decentralized networks are even possible to create on the timelines that investors are expecting. Therefore, ethereum investors buying it on the promise of the realization of this tech in the near future are almost guaranteed to be disappointed. Additionally, ethereum is making the switch to the largely untested Proof of Stake algorithm, which will change incentives that secure the network. This brings me to my key point:
Stay within your circle of competence. You can grow your circle – slowly. Cryptoassets are almost impossibly complex to grasp with just a cursory look. Investing in them requires weeks of reading and a very skeptical view.
The above was an introduction to cryptocurrencies, the different ones on offer, and why investing in ethereum is not the slam dunk everyone thinks it is. This portion of the post will tell you about the kind of due diligence you need to do if you want to invest, rather than speculate, in crypto.
The first thing to mention is that passive investing in crypto has historically been a terrible strategy. Just buying bitcoin almost always outperformed. This was due to the poor set of altcoins, and the size of bitcoin's almost insurmountable network effect. This sort of changed in March and April when bitcoin's dominance went from 80% to ~50%, and it remains to be seen if this will persist or not. But the point is, buying the index is usually an awful strategy in crypto, particularly because there are so many truly awful projects out there.
So what does it take to invest responsibly in cryptocurrencies? It requires at least a basic understanding of three disciplines: public-private key cryptography; programming, and how open-source projects function; and economics, particularly game theory and the quantity theory of money. This is why is is so difficult to apprehend easily: because very few people actually boast a sincere understanding of these three topics. I certainly don't.
You need to be able to determine whether the tech is actually going anywhere, and whether the task the developers have set themselves is possible or realistic. You need to know how open source networks are governed, and which models strike the best balance between efficiency of decision-making and fair consensus. You need to be able to measure the inflation schedule of the cryptocurrency, and see whether your coins are going to inflated away. You need to be able to make plausible guesses about the potential market for the crypto and estimate future values. Note that the payoff structure is not equity-like. It's more like early stage venture capital, or buying loss-making biotech companies. Here's my checklist of questions to answer, ordered by importance:
  • Does the project offer a significant improvement over its nearest competitor, or a reasonable chance of success in its stated aim? Is there a demand for this project? Does it have a concise and reasonable goal? (Narrower goal: higher likelihood of success).
  • Is the development team competent? Are they committed to the coin? What's their track record? Is is an active dev team? Do they have a roadmap for the future? Are they transparent about goals?
  • How is the development team funded? Is the currency corporate-backed? Is the funding transparent? Was the coin significantly premined? (Usually bad) Are developers paid via iterative community project crowdfunding? (Usually good).
  • What is the governance structure of the currency? Who holds ultimate control over decisionmaking? How are decisions made? Are they transparent? Are mining/developer incentives aligned?
  • Does the asset have acceptance and use today? Does it have a functioning use case? If it doesn't, does it have a decent chance of being accepted?
  • Has the asset's "market cap" tripled or quintupled in the last few months? Was this based on any fundamental changes (new software releases, etc) or just speculation?
  • What are the transaction volumes like? (Hint: divide market cap by monthly averaged daily on-chain tx volume to find a consistent ratio) What's the ratio of on-chain transaction versus exchange speculation? Has price gone up independent of transaction volumes?
  • How long has the asset been around? Think of the Lindy effect. Older is usually better.
  • What's the community like? Is there censorship? Does it have an active subreddit? Do the developers answer questions? Are they accessible? How big is the github community? (Hint: you can divide market cap by github commits to find a comparable ratio).
  • Are you psychologically able to hold this coin in a 90% downturn? Is this a high conviction thesis or are you betting on being able to sell it to a greater fool?
How long did it take you to learn about investing in equities? Reading balance sheets, running DCF and DRI models, figuring out how to value a stock based on comparables? Years? How many mistakes did you make before you figured out how to be responsible?
Cryptos are an asset class that is both radically different from anything that has existed before. They are also incredibly heterogeneous, as I argued above. It also leads to cultism – so bitcoiners generally take a dim view of ethereum, and vice versa. Monero fans generally don't like dash, and so on. You have to keep your mind open to understand new opportunities as they arise, and to stop yourself becoming too mentally invested in your project of choice. The vast majority of projects will fail within 5 years, so becoming overly certain of the success of one will probably devastate you. If you can stay balanced, stay honest about your crypto's chances of success and adoption, not get tunnel vision, and not take overly risky positions, you have a good chance of not losing everything. Remember the payoff structure. Heavily rightward skewed. A ton of cryptos earn no return and a select few earn an absurd (1,000-10,000x) return.
None of this is necessary if you just want to invest randomly in one of the top ten cryptos. That's the strategy of 95% of investors today. Pick a coin and go. If it's not bitcoin, I can pretty much guarantee you'll lose money. The newer, the worse.
I've not made an effort to convince you that cryptos have intrinsic value. If you've made it this far, you probably think they're worth something at least. However, they're probably not worth as much as the market is pricing them at right now. Especially not those in the ethereum family. I'm not going to tell you what to invest in, because that would defeat the purpose of this post. I'm telling you to do your due diligence before blindly buying a crypto. And that due diligence on ethereum is as complex and difficult as Tesla or Amazon DD. And that your skills in equity valuation are pretty much useless in this asset class. My circle of competence doesn't extend to options or lean pork futures, so I don't touch those. I suggest that until you really feel comfortable in crypto, you don't buy randomly.
Summative thoughts:
  1. Investing in crypto is hard
  2. 90% of people that invest at market peaks will lose money
  3. You have to extremely skeptical and invest in high-conviction positions
  4. Cryptos are exhibiting bubbly behavior right now, it's a pretty bad time to pick one out
  5. Cryptos are nothing like equities but they do have real value
  6. Cryptos are the future, but almost none of these coins will survive 10 years
  7. The older the better
  8. Governance is key
  9. These are speculative positions, only invest what you can tolerate losing
  10. You can make money investing in cryptos
  11. Passively investing in cryptos doesn't work
  12. It's a winner takes most market, there won't be 1 crypto that wins. There will be different cryptos for different use cases.
edit: deleted chart with probabilities of success because of subjectivity and oversimplification.
edit2: I've been overwhelmed with PMs so bear with me. also, please forgive any spelling errors on this post. I wrote it in one frenzied sitting.
edit3: I knew I would get a fair amount of resistance from ethereum investors (even though I attempted to keep my post as balanced as possible) but I was unprepared from the breathtaking volume of spam and diversity of attacks. One particular user has made 30 comments in this thread. I don't have a stake in ETC, period. The post is 3000 words long and most of it is about how to properly do your due diligence in a crypto. if ethereum fares poorly by standard due diligence metrics, then perhaps your issue is deeper than one post on /investing.
final edit: there have been some broken-hearted ethereum fans very busy organizing brigades against this post, and attacking me personally, and so on. It's all very incovenient. I can tell that I struck a nerve. This post isn't really about ethereum - it's about how to do research in crypto, and why you can't expect to profit handsomely without that due diligence. I mentioned ethereum because there are 3 or 4 breathless posts on here a day about its stunning gains and whether it's worth investing in. My answer: read about it first, from a diverse set of sources. A final note: I do not own any ethereum classic, I have never owned ethereum classic. I brought it up because it is part of the ethereum story, and an example of what happens when you have a contested hard fork. I do hope that ethereum succeeds, I am just cautioning against over exuberance.
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